Strengthening Bonds and Gratitude During COVID-19
Published on May 12, 2020 - Updated on May 14, 2020
Our Family’s Personal Quarantine Journey With Our Amazing Au Pair
The au pair program is a cultural exchange program designated by the U.S. Department of State, in which families host international child caregivers under the age of twenty-six, typically for one year in their homes. Thousands of American families participate in the program each year. This year, if you’re fortunate enough to have the support of an au pair during COVID-19, you can likely relate to our deep gratitude for the love, generosity and flexibility shared with our family during this time.
In early March, there was a lot of contradicting information, fear, and confusion about the state of the virus and public health projections. Amidst that chaos, some au pairs made the hard decision to return home as the borders started to close. Frankly, I can understand! Being in quarantine together is a big commitment. For many au pairs, one of the main reasons they choose an au pair year is to travel, meet new friends, and explore American culture. Stay at home orders change the reality of those dreams and aspirations indefinitely.
During this time, our au pair was looking forward to a spring break and vacation separate from our family. We were also excited for her to experience independent travel and a new place. As the coronavirus cases and resulting ‘stay at home’ orders increased, we came to a mutual understanding that her trip just wasn’t going to happen. Fortunately, she was able to recoup her expenses but, as can be expected, she was terribly disappointed. That said, I was amazed at her maturity level and wondered if I would have been so level-headed at her age.
After the cancellation of her trip, we began to adjust to isolation as a family. By some stroke of luck (truly we won the lottery here), our au pair is actually a kindergarten teacher in her home country of Mexico. She created a schedule and activities to continue the structure of a classroom for our four and five-year-old daughters, who attended a local Montessori prior to COVID-19.
This was a big shift for our au pair, who had mornings and early afternoons off previously. But again, she handled it with such grace and a positive attitude, always looking at the bright side of things. She said to me recently, “It’s been great that I have gotten to familiarize myself with the Montessori method by working more closely with virtual learning with the girls’ school.” I was blown away by her ability to adjust and to find the silver lining.
While all of this was extremely positive, the transition was not without bumps. It took time for the girls to get used to my husband and I being home but not available due to work. We also worked together to structure our time so there was no concern that our au pair’s now virtual English classes would be disrupted.
We’ve become closer during this time, and spend a lot more of our free time together, so the week was especially sad, stressful and challenging when her grandmother, who had lived next door to her, passed away. The loss was devastating, especially considering the separation from her family. I ached for her.
We obviously gave her the space she needed to rest, Facetime with her family, and generally mourn. We sent her flowers and offered her more tenderness, but we felt helplessly unable to sufficiently console her, or truly understand her pain. Yet, she persevered and has left us even more in awe of her than ever.
Our au pair loved us faithfully and unselfishly amidst personal loss and a life-changing quarantine. Clearly, I cannot ever thank her enough but I hope to show her just how much we appreciate her on the flipside of all of this. She has been not only the key to survival for this dual working couple, but a comfort and delight to get to know amidst these strange days.
Interested in hosting an au pair? We had an incredible experience with Cultural Care Au Pair!! We look forward to hearing about your uplifting personal journeys with your own Au Pair at share@happyly.com. We may even reach out to feature your family's experience!
We welcome you to check out our blog for more inspiration from Adapting to Our New Normal, join as we Banish Boredom or helpful tips on Nurturing Your Partnership in light of social distancing.
Also, please take a moment to explore this week’s happyly Survival Toolbox, including a Daily Schedule designed to create positive days at home with your family. As always, we welcome your family's highlights! Tag us on Instagram @gethappyly!